Eyes Wide Open

We are closing in on the half-way mark of our “community assessment period”, as the Peace Corps calls it. We’ve met with community stakeholders, been counseled by our Kgosi (chief) and her subordinates, received insight and advice from the District AIDS Coordinator, the police, local development organizations, the National AIDS Coordinating Agency, the Village Development Committees, local scholars of the Botswana- Harvard partnership, social workers and health practitioners…all to help us gain an overview of the needs and current practices in our new community- laying the groundwork for future projects.

The issues are complex- and they bring up a staggering plethora of pieces of advice from my past- from working in Old Naledi, to the halls of KU, and K-State, and the visiting scholars from the African Issues Symposium. What is one thing I have learned about development work so far? Development work, missions, relief work, service, social work, volunteerism, the non-profit sector, charity, philanthropy, however you want to frame it- it’s broken- “boggen”- as my nephew, would have described it. 

I think I’ve grown up with an image of reality that is pretty out of whack. Still, it was the image floating in my head, popping up in my stereotypes. My short lifetime of experience has only begun its journey of undoing.  

This is NOT reality: The world is a funny dichotomy. It is a market-driven place in which people go to school, work, get promoted, improve their standard of living, compete, succeed- all for the self. But, behold, there is a beautiful counter-segment of people doing self-less work. The missionaries, Mother Theresas, the Greg Mortensons, these types have rejected the system of achievement for the sake of the self and have chosen to embark on a life that is about others…and so much more fulfilling.

No, this is NOT reality. In truth, development is broken. We like projects that feel good. Everyone wants to build the water pump (Damberger, 2011), but nobody wants to do the maintenance, to invest the time, to learn what others have done, to avoid redundancy. It looks good to give something that nobody has; it also looks like privilege. We have something to give to you, poor souls. Look at our choices, our life, as an example- never mind that our wealth and your poverty might be two sides of the same coin. Am I benefiting from a system that exploits you? And then, am I stepping in, too late, to offer a hand that appears so benevolent. We have a system that perpetuates patterns of inequality. It is a system that makes assumptions about who is endowed with the rights to lead, to decide who benefits from foreign investment, etc. Living a selfless life IS fulfilling, it feels good, but it often benefits the self more than others, and the ramifications of that work can be far-reaching and dangerous.

It has been a short time, but a long journey from being a kid in Botswana, recognizing that most missionaries didn’t do what I thought they did. Then slowly realizing that I was usually in the dark with my local community, communication is rarely frank, so I often missed what was actually going on. It is hard for an outsider to say that something is having such and such an impact or not, or even to have a clue about what is happening and whether it is actually happening. Things were not what they seemed. Recipients say things that donors want to hear. We have been molded by a long system of learning to “market” development, of learning how to appeal to heartstrings, by a system of development that is self-perpetuating, that doesn’t work- that exploits inequalities and plunges them deeper. Good scholars, found much later in life, revealed a system embedded deeply in history that makes this brokenness difficult to escape. Is sustainability and development possible when it fits into, and sometimes reproduces, inequality? The funny thing is that this realization about development work is nothing new. I am no expert, but followers of Christ all know that the world is broken. That is why we need to be rescued. If the world is broken, why should it surprise me that development work is also broken?

My wise sister is an evaluator for this type of work, and she is inspirational to me because she looks deeper, she analyzes how best to serve others without damaging them in the process, how to admit when we are wrong and need to revise. She is a reminder that WE do not always know what is best, but that we can be responsible by engaging with others, by remaining dependent on others who serve and are being served, by communicating with experts, by taking their warnings seriously and by implementing their best strategies- by doing our research. Not too long ago, she and I were randomly chatting about Robert Lupton’s (2012) Hippocratic oath of sorts for development work; a call to engage in reciprocal, non-hierarchical work, where above all we “do no harm.” And I might add to that…work that builds the capacity of others, and is not dependent on us alone. YES! Please. Of course, this is what we want to do, but the scary thing is: how do we know how to do it, or how do we know when our work is causing unforeseen harm?

We are the most certain of our uncertainty. Fortunately for us, we live under a promise and a command: the promise of an omniscient Holy Spirit to guide our actions and to guide our inquisition as we learn about this work and take this life-long study to heart; and the command to love with the assurance that doing so “does no harm (Romans 13:10).”

And so it is, that our eyes are wide open as we jump into this new part of life. We attempt to take this next step in humility with every effort to learn from those around us and be led by God, and not our own wisdom.

So, if you made it to the end of this long and tiresome post, please pray for God’s niche, that we will fit in with projects that are not about us, and that bring Him glory.